Robert Rodriguez has a vison. It's called Machete Kills Again... In Space! and it's the pre-announced title for the third film in this gritty Mexican action series. At the end of the first film, Machete (Danny Trejo, in a role he's made for) has joined the U.S. ICE with partner Sartana (Jessica Alba). At the start of the third film, Machete is tracking down the evil silver-masked villain on a space station. To get from A to B, they had to make a film, and Machete Kills is the result.
To say it's a bridge film is an understatement. It's a plot conveyance. Masked assassins kill Sartana and steal a U.S. nuclear weapon. POTUS (Carlos Estevez, yes that one) commissions Machete as the only person able to drop into Mexico and get it back. But when things go awry, Machete is left with a captive with a deathwish and 48 hours to get back to the United States.
The cameos are one of the strong spots, with a role specially made for Cuba Gooding Jr., Lady Gaga, and Antonio Banderas (yes, all of them). And I swear one of the guards at Mendez the Mad's compound looked like Bruce Campbell. But overall, it's a bridge to a contrived story, one that Robert Rodriguez would much rather tell.
Machete Kills
2013, 107 minutes, directed by Robert Rodriguez
"Machete Happens"
Thursday, September 19, 2013
Saturday, September 7, 2013
Impact
When this made-for-TV movie started a few nights ago, I had no idea Syfy would drag it out into a four-hour sap fest. In this epic tale, an asteroid - a fragment of a brown dwarf star - has crashed into the moon, causing it to veer and swing towards Earth. A team of scientists rush to find a solution before the moon impacts our planet, while meanwhile their families suffer the effects of the star's gravity and magnetism.
With a few adjustments and a different ending, I think I saw this in Melancholia a few years ago. And I hated that film. And this one was almost worse.
Impact
2008, 180 minutes, directed by Mike Rohl
With a few adjustments and a different ending, I think I saw this in Melancholia a few years ago. And I hated that film. And this one was almost worse.
Impact
2008, 180 minutes, directed by Mike Rohl
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
In the Valley of Elah
Mike Deerfield is missing, and AWOL after returning home from a tour Iraq. As his father Hank (Tommy Lee Jones), a former sergeant and MP, goes looking for his missing son, the soldier is found dead, dismembered and burnt. Working with a local detective (Charlize Theron), Hank tried to unravel the mystery and determine why his last surviving son was murdered.
The film lacks suspense. It lacks drama. It's a journey of discovery and acceptance. But most of all its sad, not just for the characters but for all the real lives pointlessly destroyed by a pointless war.
In the Valley of Elah
2007, 121 minutes, directed by Paul Haggis
The film lacks suspense. It lacks drama. It's a journey of discovery and acceptance. But most of all its sad, not just for the characters but for all the real lives pointlessly destroyed by a pointless war.
In the Valley of Elah
2007, 121 minutes, directed by Paul Haggis
Friday, August 16, 2013
Kick-Ass 2
I have mixed feelings about this franchise. While I have nothing against the films per se, my experiences with Kick-Ass were less than idea. Moreover, the existence of these led directly to the cancellation of Defender, the U.S. remake of the excellent Mirage Man with the same director and star.
But then, there's the badass that is Hit Girl. Really, the series is better every minute she's on screen and in action. In this installment, several years have passed since Dave a.k.a. Kick-Ass retired. He's in high school now, as is Hit Girl (Mindy). She's never given up her father's purpose, and still roams the streets, more dangerous than ever, dodging the oversight of police detective / guardian Marcus. Other vigilante masked heros have emerged in Kick-Ass' absence, inspired to carry on his mission. One team, which calls itself Justice Forever, is led by Colonel Stars and Stripes, a former mob enforcer cum born-again Christian.
As Dave and Mindy interact, she pulls him back into a life of crime fighting, while she eventually promises Marcus to "retire". Kick-Ass joins Justice Forever and helps in their quests to bring down human traffickers.
Meanwhile, Chris ("Red Mist" from the first film) accidentally kills his mother, and thus becomes a multimillionaire orphan, still obsessed with Kick-Ass' identity and hope for revenge. With Dave back on the crime-fighting scene, Chris don's his mother's old bondage gear and becomes Motherfucker, a superhero whose power is Wealth, which he immediately uses to hire a group of actual villians who wreak havoc on the town in their search of fame and Kick-Ass. Much violence ensues, until Kick-Ass and Motherfucker must meet for a final confrontation, and Hit Girl decides if she can truly fit into society or accept her role as perpetual outsider.
There's a dearth of kick-ass heroines, and in this series the existence of Hit Girl shines as its brightest contribution. This could easily be the end of the series, or a bridge story; it's difficult to say if it will work with them both as adults, but if it does, I'll be there to see it.
Kick-Ass 2
2013, 103 minutes, directed by Jeff Wadlow
But then, there's the badass that is Hit Girl. Really, the series is better every minute she's on screen and in action. In this installment, several years have passed since Dave a.k.a. Kick-Ass retired. He's in high school now, as is Hit Girl (Mindy). She's never given up her father's purpose, and still roams the streets, more dangerous than ever, dodging the oversight of police detective / guardian Marcus. Other vigilante masked heros have emerged in Kick-Ass' absence, inspired to carry on his mission. One team, which calls itself Justice Forever, is led by Colonel Stars and Stripes, a former mob enforcer cum born-again Christian.
As Dave and Mindy interact, she pulls him back into a life of crime fighting, while she eventually promises Marcus to "retire". Kick-Ass joins Justice Forever and helps in their quests to bring down human traffickers.
Meanwhile, Chris ("Red Mist" from the first film) accidentally kills his mother, and thus becomes a multimillionaire orphan, still obsessed with Kick-Ass' identity and hope for revenge. With Dave back on the crime-fighting scene, Chris don's his mother's old bondage gear and becomes Motherfucker, a superhero whose power is Wealth, which he immediately uses to hire a group of actual villians who wreak havoc on the town in their search of fame and Kick-Ass. Much violence ensues, until Kick-Ass and Motherfucker must meet for a final confrontation, and Hit Girl decides if she can truly fit into society or accept her role as perpetual outsider.
There's a dearth of kick-ass heroines, and in this series the existence of Hit Girl shines as its brightest contribution. This could easily be the end of the series, or a bridge story; it's difficult to say if it will work with them both as adults, but if it does, I'll be there to see it.
Kick-Ass 2
2013, 103 minutes, directed by Jeff Wadlow
Sunday, July 28, 2013
The Wolverine
I've mostly taken a break from film this summer. While some released have piqued my interest, there have been more important things to do with my time, or I haven't felt like going out. Last night, though, I was free, and so I continued a series I've been following from the start.
The Wolverine is the latest film in the X-Men movie franchise, which has previously consisted of X-Men (heavily featuring Wolverine), X2 (half a Wolverine origin story), X-Men: The Last Stand (a horrible film focused on Wolverine and Phoenix), X-Men Origins: Wolverine (which burns 150 years of origins in an opening montage, then focuses on events a few years before the first film), and X-Men First Class (which only features a Wolverine cameo).
Okay, the Wolverine story is good. But really? This time, events take place after those of The Last Stand. Logan has isolated himself as a virtual hermit in Alaska, promising himself (and his haunting memories of Jean Grey) to not hurt anyone ever again. But when some stupid hunters kill a bear, he gets angry and goes into town to pick a fight. He's stopped from killing them by Yukio, a mutant who can see their imminent death and who was tasked to find Logan. She takes him to Japan, where he visits Yashida, the CEO of the largest corporation in Asia. From a flashback, we learn that Yashida and Logan survived the destruction of Nagasaki, with Logan shielding the Japanese officer in a well.
Yashida is dying and says he can repay Logan for the gift of life so many years before: Yashida can transfer Logan's regeneration to himself, saving his life, and allowing Logan the relief of aging and eventual death. Logan rejects the offer, and Yashida dies that night. So begins a story of Japanese family drama and political intrigue, as Logan, mysteriously without his regeneration power, decides to risk everything to save Mariko, Yashida's granddaughter, whom the yakuza for some reason want to capture.
Other than him being a nice guy, or wanting some of her (which he gets), this sudden dedication never gets explained. Indeed, the plot is driven and made "interesting" by several convoluted plot twists, unexplained motivations, and sudden allegiance shifts. In the end Logan survives of course, though his claws are now their original bone (having been cut off, only the bone regrew). He gives Mariko one last kiss, then departs with Yukio. During the closing credits, there's a scene set two years later in which Logan meets Magneto and - back from the dead - Professor Xavier, who explain that there's a serious threat and he's needed again.
I can live with the plots of bridge films. I know what they're for. But in this case the plot is just bad, as is, sadly, some of the acting. Plus, while the movie may have been filmed in 2D, the computer effects and camera shots were made for 3D, and some of the cinematography was therefore "wonky" on a 2D screen. Overall, there was little to like about the story.
The Wolverine
2013, 126 minutes, directed by James Mangold
The Wolverine is the latest film in the X-Men movie franchise, which has previously consisted of X-Men (heavily featuring Wolverine), X2 (half a Wolverine origin story), X-Men: The Last Stand (a horrible film focused on Wolverine and Phoenix), X-Men Origins: Wolverine (which burns 150 years of origins in an opening montage, then focuses on events a few years before the first film), and X-Men First Class (which only features a Wolverine cameo).
Okay, the Wolverine story is good. But really? This time, events take place after those of The Last Stand. Logan has isolated himself as a virtual hermit in Alaska, promising himself (and his haunting memories of Jean Grey) to not hurt anyone ever again. But when some stupid hunters kill a bear, he gets angry and goes into town to pick a fight. He's stopped from killing them by Yukio, a mutant who can see their imminent death and who was tasked to find Logan. She takes him to Japan, where he visits Yashida, the CEO of the largest corporation in Asia. From a flashback, we learn that Yashida and Logan survived the destruction of Nagasaki, with Logan shielding the Japanese officer in a well.
Yashida is dying and says he can repay Logan for the gift of life so many years before: Yashida can transfer Logan's regeneration to himself, saving his life, and allowing Logan the relief of aging and eventual death. Logan rejects the offer, and Yashida dies that night. So begins a story of Japanese family drama and political intrigue, as Logan, mysteriously without his regeneration power, decides to risk everything to save Mariko, Yashida's granddaughter, whom the yakuza for some reason want to capture.
Other than him being a nice guy, or wanting some of her (which he gets), this sudden dedication never gets explained. Indeed, the plot is driven and made "interesting" by several convoluted plot twists, unexplained motivations, and sudden allegiance shifts. In the end Logan survives of course, though his claws are now their original bone (having been cut off, only the bone regrew). He gives Mariko one last kiss, then departs with Yukio. During the closing credits, there's a scene set two years later in which Logan meets Magneto and - back from the dead - Professor Xavier, who explain that there's a serious threat and he's needed again.
I can live with the plots of bridge films. I know what they're for. But in this case the plot is just bad, as is, sadly, some of the acting. Plus, while the movie may have been filmed in 2D, the computer effects and camera shots were made for 3D, and some of the cinematography was therefore "wonky" on a 2D screen. Overall, there was little to like about the story.
The Wolverine
2013, 126 minutes, directed by James Mangold
Sunday, June 23, 2013
The Town That Was
In Centralia, Pennsylvania, a fire burns. In 1962, to clear up the smell before Memorial Day, a controlled burn was started in the garbage dump pit. A few days later, when they noticed that the pit was still smoking, the townsfolk realized that the fire had ignited the anthracite coal that lines this part of eastern Pennsylvania. It might have been easy to stop - at the time, a trench around the pit might have cut off the fire for a few thousand dollars. Instead, it was mostly ignored - for 17 years - steam vents were added, and residents installed methane detectors - until the local gas station owner, wondering why he was losing gas - realized the tanks were being heated to 170 F in the ground. Coupled with a sinkhole that nearly swallowed a small boy, the state and federal governments finally started taking action.
Unfortunately the most cost effective option at that time was to move the people out, and so the state started buying and demolishing homes and businesses, voluntarily at first, but eventually through eminent domain.
This documentary tells the story as of 2007, when some dozen or so residents remain "squatting" in their own homes, all now owned by the government. It's a fascinating story of a city in decline, but the documentary is pretty much ruined by focusing on John Lokitis, the youngest remaining resident, who in his 30s lives in the family home and maintains several blocks of the former city. He rambles on about how special the town is, and how it's such a shame to see it change, which may be true, but then he says that there's no danger and the government should return the land and people should move back, all while we can see the smoke rising from the ground behind him on camera.
The last remaining residents blame the government for lying to them, for in the 1980s promising that no one would be forced out, not once considering that the situation, the fire, and everyone in the government had since changed. It should be all about the fire, and the town as it was, not about the man who stubbornly refuses to move on from the small town where he grew up, as it slowly burns from the fire started 21 years before he was born.
In Centralia, Pennsylvania, a fire burns.
The Town That Was
2007, 71 minutes, directed by Chris Perkel and Georgie Roland
Unfortunately the most cost effective option at that time was to move the people out, and so the state started buying and demolishing homes and businesses, voluntarily at first, but eventually through eminent domain.
This documentary tells the story as of 2007, when some dozen or so residents remain "squatting" in their own homes, all now owned by the government. It's a fascinating story of a city in decline, but the documentary is pretty much ruined by focusing on John Lokitis, the youngest remaining resident, who in his 30s lives in the family home and maintains several blocks of the former city. He rambles on about how special the town is, and how it's such a shame to see it change, which may be true, but then he says that there's no danger and the government should return the land and people should move back, all while we can see the smoke rising from the ground behind him on camera.
The last remaining residents blame the government for lying to them, for in the 1980s promising that no one would be forced out, not once considering that the situation, the fire, and everyone in the government had since changed. It should be all about the fire, and the town as it was, not about the man who stubbornly refuses to move on from the small town where he grew up, as it slowly burns from the fire started 21 years before he was born.
In Centralia, Pennsylvania, a fire burns.
The Town That Was
2007, 71 minutes, directed by Chris Perkel and Georgie Roland
Friday, June 21, 2013
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