Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant

The night of the undead begins with the first installment in this, the latest vampire franchise to be milked for teenage girls. This is the story of Darren, a boy who is led to give up his normal life and join a freak show as the assistant to a 200-year vampire. Little does he know that fate has plans for him as the instigator of renewed war with the more-bloodthirsty vampanese.

The Paramount was stacked with junior high and high school girls for this premiere, leaving us regular Fantastic Fest badge holders far outnumbered. The audience however seemed to really get into the film and the stars on hand for its premiere. The film was at its worst when it tried to be serious with itself, and best when playing on inside jokes between the script and the audience. While I may not seek out the remaining installments (until my daughter(s) beg me too in 10+ years), I hope the film succeeds and can continue the story.

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant
2009, directed by Paul Weitz

Under the Mountain

I see a lot of films that try to be something and fail. This film attempts to be a modern children's fantasy adventure, along the lines of Labyrinth or E.T., and succeeds admirably. The good guys are 100% noble or attain redemption, the bad guys are bad but a bit comically so, the urgency is dire and the adventure roars.

Under the Mountain
2009, 91 minutes, directed by Jonathan King

Fish Story

This wasn't at all what I expected. This slow, winding story leaps across time to what appear to be events only barely related by an unknown 1975 song by an unknown Japanese punk rock band. But watching the first hour and a half is so very much worth it to see the last half hour when they bring it all home.

Fish Story
2009, 112 minutes, directed by Yoshihiro Nakamura

Doghouse

Finally, some kick ass film to wake me up. The action starts fast and never stops. "Now is not the time to stop objectifying women." Fantastic.

Doghouse
2009, 89 minutes, directed by Jake West

Men Who Stare at Goats

As a secret screening, I had no idea what this one would be. It turned out to be marginal. It's a spiritual journey through the Iraq desert, weaving the tales of the U.S. military's 1980s-era New Earth Army and the fate of its solders. It's a "finding yourself" comedy where you aren't meant to laugh (often) but are supposed to feel good about yourself when its over. It's a bit baffling, really. The whole audience was left a big surprised when it just... ended.

Men Who Stare at Goats
2009, 90 minutes, directed by Grant Heslov

(Second time that last-second CGI has marred a film this festival.)

RoboGeisha

Well, this is the screening for which I'm giving up Zombieland. I suspect it's going to be RoboGeisha... and I'm right. Part geisha film, part splatter fest, part body modification, part giant robots, the film seems to be none of those things very well. And while the director warned us that he wasn't allowed to show humans spewing blood, the use instead of CG blood was downright distracting. (Though, having buildings bleed instead was novel.) Eh, given the limitations he should have shelved this script for later.

RoboGeisha
2009, directed by Noboru Iguchi

While they claim contractual obligations prevent this from being called the "world premiere", no one outside cast and crew have seen it before. That's good enough for me.

Krabat

This middle-ages sorcery tale drags in at two full hours long. While it's a good story - and would make a great novel, it's a bit slow for the screen. I did enjoy the imagery.

Krabat
2008, 120 minutes, directed by Marco Kreuzpaintner